December 21, 2012: The day the Earth dies
The world as we know it will be destroyed on December 21, 2012.
Note that I do not say maybe or say or anything like that, I say it directly and very clearly: The world WILL BE destroyed on December 21, 2012.
Doesn’t that prove I’m a freeloader… er, I mean a prophet, straight from the portal of er… straight from… wherever the prophets come from?
Haha… no, it doesn’t. I am NOT a prophet. I am a conspiracy theorist and my name is Conspiracy Man.
I became Conspiracy Man when the Big Booming Voice popped into my head one day and… er… ok, that’s a whole different story. This article is not about that, but about what will happen on December 21, 2012.
Let me give you the real facts and not the usual speculation you read on all these other websites.
I, Conspiracy Man (loud echo), am the only one who knows the truth.
People think that on December 21, 2012, only one thing will happen that will destroy the world as we know it. That is simply not true. Basically, there is no single event that can destroy our world. No, sisters and brothers, you have to get up very early in the morning to destroy the whole world. Earth is a hard cookie.
On December 1, 2012, so many disasters are going to hit the earth at the same time, that we have no chance of surviving. No, luck at all. When all those disasters happen at the same time, that is, at 10:00 on December 21, 2012, the earth will break like an egg.
Well, some of us will survive, because some of us, namely me, Conspiracy Man (loud echo), are building an underground titanium hideout, where I’m going to spend the cataclysm while drinking Coke and playing Need For Speed. on my Xbox 360. (And, by the way, watching and laughing at the people who laugh and make fun of articles like this, through my video-wall, built into my titanium underground hideout).
Others will survive, because they will be safe in giant arks, which the Chinese are building in the Himalayas as you read this, when disaster strikes. For those who now want to rush to get their names on the list, wait; he will have to pay a billion euros in advance before his name appears on the list. (By the way, this was not stolen from the plot of the 2012 movie. 2012 was made to portray the actual construction of the giant arks in the Himalayas, so any conspiracy theorists who write about that will be called fools, because the people will say it comes from a movie plot. Can you see how smart the Illuminati are?)
After these disasters, about 8 percent of the world’s population will be left alive. We will have to rebuild the world from scratch.
Not a pretty picture… not a pretty picture at all…
I have studied a lot and collected information about the cataclysm of 2012:
I put my sticky fingers on highly classified secret photos that the powers that rule this world don’t want you to see.
Why is 2012 going to happen?
Who first predicted 2012 and how did they know it was true?
What exactly will happen on December 21, 2012? It’s more of a mess, but what exactly are those messes?
Is there anything you can do to protect yourself and your loved ones on that faithful day?
How is the current recession connected to December 21, 2012?
How does the current crisis in the Middle East and other Arabic-speaking nations relate to December 21, 2012?
Why is Muammar Gaddafi a key figure in the cataclysm of December 21, 2012? Just think about it for a second, he has always been living in a tent, no matter where he went. I have found out why.
Watch this space as the clock ticks down…