The best way to avoid a power struggle with a 10- or 11-year-old is to make sure they know you are the parent. This is more than just telling them, you have to act like a parent. Children do what they see, rather than what they are told, as a general rule. If you act as if you are assuming the role of a responsible parent, they will respect your role. Schedules, follow through, and love are the most important ways to prevent a power struggle.

set a schedule

You and your child should have a set time to do almost everything. The 10-11 year old should have responsibilities and consequences if she does not comply. The schedule should have homework in the morning, homework in the afternoon, and homework in the evening. Homework, housework, and personal time should be included. This will help the 10-11 year old to know her place in the parent/child relationship.

Go ahead

To avoid power struggles, it’s important to follow through with what you say. If you say you’re going to the mall, make sure it happens. If you tell your child that he will get in trouble, be sure to give him a consequence, one that is appropriate. This helps children to take a person seriously. However, a person who is not going to follow will eventually have to deal with a power struggle, from a growing child.

hugs and understanding

If a child is upset, it is the perfect time to listen and give him love. Hugs are an important part of a child’s ability to see that you understand and love. If a child is worried about her own life, at this age, a hug lets her know you love her better than words. Children need to know that parents love them, even in difficult situations, a hug works perfectly to show it.

Do you want to learn exactly how to eliminate your child’s out-of-control and challenging behavior without using punishments, time-outs, behavior plans, or rewards?