Being dumped is a terrible feeling. You start to question everything. You lose all your self-confidence, leaving you a broken and bitter man. You stop eating, you can’t sleep and you don’t even want to think about other women because the one you had was The One and no one will be as good as her.

So, try to win her back. You buy her flowers, you try to take her out to dinner, you humble yourself and say you can change and you can make this work. That you’re willing to do whatever she wants. That you are there for her, that you love her, that nothing is worth without her.

All of these are mistakes.

The only way to get her back is, oddly enough, not to make it look like you want her back. By forgetting about her. Just living your life. In this article, I am going to go through a list of ways to get it back.

1. Stop communicating with her

This means no more Facebook, text messages, tweets, phone calls… none of that. You need me to leave you alone. You need time for yourself. She is the one who left you, after all. She is the one who “turned the key”, as Costanza would say, and finished it. So she cut her out of your life. Show him how easy it will be to pick up the pieces and go from there. Because you are strong, tough and have your own life.

2. Get in shape

In many cases, if you are in a long-term relationship, you may have gotten a little carried away. This is common, and also the part that needs to be repaired right away. If you’re a little overweight, it’s time to lose that guy, get on the treadmill, and start eating healthy again. Or, if you’re like me and you have a terrible stomach and can’t eat when you’re going through an emotional turmoil like a breakup, then you need to gain a healthy weight so you don’t look like an anorexic emo rocker kid.

3. Pay some money to make yourself look good

After working out and getting back in shape, go to the store and buy some nice new clothes. Spend some money on a new and better haircut. These are all ways to build your confidence, to get you back talking to girls, which will put you on a continual collision course with self-esteem.

The key to remember in all of this is not that you’re doing this to impress her. You’re doing this to impress yourself. You are doing this because you want to have the most successful and enjoyable life you can possibly have. And hey, if she wants to join me on the trip, more power to her. But you’ll be fine without it.

The main thing is to instill three feelings in her when she realizes how well you are doing. You want her to feel:

1. jealous

Those other girls have a chance with you, amazing guy. She could lose you. You are no longer under her control.

2. Homesickness

For a time when things were going well between you two. At first, he will only remember how terrible the last few months or weeks were, when he decided to break up with you. But there was a good time there somewhere, a time that she will remember and that will make her want to be with you again.

3. Sexual feelings

You’ll also want to get them out of it. How? Well, my teasing video has a few ways to flirt and get those feelings back:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zvrt98DUtQA

Do this and she will be clamoring to be back with you in no time.